Today’s topic is ‘When Males Do Not Want to Initiate Intimacy and Sex in a Relationship. Let’s Talk about it.’
I got asked to comment on this very important topic after talking to one of my patients today.
Often there is a perception that all males have high libidos and nothing could be further from the truth. Libidos differ in all relationships and sometime the female will have a higher libido that the male.
In this video I talk about some of the reasons why and what can be done to help this issue for couples.
I have also done an article on Exercises for Better Sex
Dr Andrew Orr
Part of my job as a healthcare practitioner with a special interest in and reproductive conditions, and women’s and men’s health conditions, is to talk about sex, talk about climax and the benefits of this for a couple, or an individual.
Regular sex, or regular climax, can help have many benefits for an individual, with it helping everything from menstrual pain, right through to increasing pregnancy rates, regulation of the menstrual cycle and even helping moods, sleep and helping your live longer
Here are 17 reasons why you should be having regular climax, or regular sex and many of the health benefits that go with it.
It’s not necessarily a full workout, but it can be as good for you as moderate exercise. It raises your heart rate about the same as a brisk walk or a slow bike ride.
2.Good for a Woman’s Heart
Women who have sex a couple of times a week are less likely to get heart disease than those who have it once a month. Whether that’s because healthier women enjoy it more often, or because it helps protect a woman’s heart is unclear.
3.May Help Your Headache
Say goodbye to the old standby “Not tonight, Dear. I have a headache.” It turns out sex can help with pain, and that includes some kinds of headaches, such as migraines. Not feeling frisky? Try: “Not tonight, Honey. I have a highly contagious stomach bug.” Works every time.
People who have more sex are less anxious when they’re faced with stressful tasks like public speaking or arithmetic. But according to the study, it only works when you have a partner — masturbation doesn’t count.
5.You May Live Longer
One study suggested that married women who climaxed more often had a slight tendency to live longer. Researchers aren’t sure if the sex actually lengthens your life or it’s just a side effect of a healthy lifestyle. But why take any chances?
6.Sharpens Your Mind
Sex has been linked to the making of new brain cells, and that’s a good thing. People over 50 who had more sex were better able to recall numbers and do basic math, and the difference was pretty big. It seemed to help men more than women, but both did better than those who had less sex.
7.Makes You Happy
You don’t have to overdo it — once a week is plenty. More than that, and the effect fades. But scientists only studied couples in committed relationships, so if you’re trying to meet your quota by picking up strangers at your local bar, all bets are off.
8.Bonds You to Your Partner
The hormone oxytocin is released during sex, and it sparks feelings of intimacy, affection, and closeness with your partner. That helps build a strong, stable relationship, which is good for everyone.
9.Keeps You Lean
The more sex you have, the slimmer you’re likely to be. Is that because more sex keeps you trim? Or because lean people have more sex? Scientists don’t really know, but all you need is a partner and a bathroom scale to try to find out.
10.Good for Mental Health
Adults in committed relationships who have more sex are less likely to be depressed or take medication for mental health issues. Orgasm also helps with the release of beneficial hormones such as oxytocin and these help us feel euphoric and also help with other endorphins in the body. These then make us feel better emotionally.
11.May Help Your Immune System
Move over, vitamin C. College students who had sex twice a week had more cold-fighting antibodies in their saliva than those who had sex less often. Couples who have regular sex have healthier immune systems and tend to be healthier overall.
12.Helps You Sleep
Orgasm triggers a surge of endorphins and oxytocin in both men and women, and that dulls pain and relaxes you. Both of those can help you sleep more easily, though according to scientists — and many women — the effect is more pronounced in men.
13.Lowers Risk of Cancer
Men who have more sex may be less likely to get prostate cancer, and women less likely to get breast cancer. Pregnancy and contact with sperm are both linked to the lower risk in women.
14.You Could Make a Baby
If you’re trying to have a baby, the more sex you have, the more likely you are to hit the right time of the month. But more sex may also prime women for pregnancy and improve sperm quality in men, which can speed things along. An egg has but 24 hours to be fertilized otherwise it dies. We also know that ovulation does not occur just mid-cycle either. Couples doing IVF also need to have regular sex as climax helps with implantation (by hormones and increased blood supply into the lining) and sperm also assist in helping with implantation as well. Many couples stop having sex during IVF and this is where they are going wrong.
15.It helps regulate your menstrual cycle
Regular climax nourishes the uterine and vagina with blood flow, but it also stimulates hormones, which help to also nourish the uterus, vagina and reproductive organs. Oxytocin helps with moods but it also helps with keeping your cycle regular. Research has also shown that sperm actually help to trigger ovulation.
16.Climax helps with Gynaecological issues and menstrual pain
Regular climax (not just sex with penetration) helps with increasing blood flow into the pelvic cavity, the uterine lining, vagina and surrounding areas which helps to keep your reproductive organs and muscles healthy. Hormones and increased blood flow also help with pain and circulation too. Climax helps with the microcirculation of the reproductive organs and also helps with keeping ovarian function regular and healthy too. As said before regular climax can help trigger ovulation, keep the cycle regular, but sperm can also help with this also. We do know that some women with endometriosis and adenomyosis do have pain with penetrative sex, but climax does not necessarily need for penetration to happen.
NB- If you do have pain with intercourse, please make sure you get investigated properly as there are treatments and management to help this.
17.Helps Your Future Health and is Anti-Aging.
People who have more sex may have better quality of life — and not just now, but in the future, too. If you have an active sex life in middle age, you’re more likely to keep it up as you get older, which is linked to better health and happiness. Regular sex and climax is also anti-aging.
Please remember that sex and regular climax has more benefits to it that the actual enjoyment part of it. It helps with intimacy, helps bring couples closer together and it helps with many other health benefits in the body. In practice I am seeing a huge disconnect with both men and women and their reproductive organs and this is why we are seeing so many issues with gynaecological conditions, couples not being able to conceive, relationships issues and issues with peoples health and lifestyles.
In a healthy relationship, couples should be having sex at least 1-3 times per week and if you are trying to have a baby, you should be having sex everyday and be going for it multiple times per day to increase your chances of conception. Maybe it’s time to turn off the TV, close the computer, turn off the mobile phone and spend more time in the bedroom with your own lives, then watching someone else’s. You will be healthier and happier for it in the long run.
If you do want to find out more about my fertility program, or how I may be able to assist you with a women’s health condition, please call my friendly staff and they will explain everything to you.
-Women’s and Men’s Health Advocate
-No Stone Left Unturned
The traditional theory that women have the potential to ovulate at one time in the month (being around day 14) is actually been proven to be wrong and is something many have known for a long time
This research was first published back in 2000 in the British medical journal and then research, published in the journal Fertility and Sterility in 2003(2003;80: 116-22 [PubMed]) could explain why the “rhythm” method of contraception is so unreliable and why women who take hormonal contraceptives sometimes become pregnant.
Researchers from these studies did daily ultrasound scans on women who apparently had normal menstrual cycles. Some were nulliparous; others had had up to three children. They found that all of the women produced at least two and sometimes 3 major waves of follicular development.
The existing theory held that at the beginning of each menstrual cycle, 15 to 20 follicles begin to grow in the ovaries and that one of them develops into a mature egg at roughly the middle of the cycle. The research showed that 40% of the subjects had the clear biological potential to produce more than one egg in a single month. Moreover, they could be fertile at any time of the month.
“These studies have actually caused the rewriting of the human reproduction textbooks” The leading researchers have explained. “It explains why natural family planning often doesn’t work, why hormonal contraception sometimes fails, and why we see fraternal twins with different conception dates.” The studies have also helped to improve assisted reproduction success rates too and why we see some women ovulate again (as part of their natural cycle) after hormone induced ovulation.
Research published back in 2000 that was published in the British medical Journal also showed that “Ovulation – Fertile days are unpredictable”
The timing of the fertile window is highly variable and to assume that ovulation occurs on day 14 or between day 10 and day 17 is based on outdated information.
Fertile days are unpredictable, and can fall anytime during the menstrual cycle-even for those women with regular Cycles. There is only a 10% probability of being fertile in the fertile window (day 10-17) as identified by Clinical guidelines and more than 70% are in the fertile window before day 10 or after day 17 of their cycle.
There is also a 1-6 % chance of being fertile during a menstrual phase of the cycle. (British medical Journal 2000 321:1259-1292)
This is why couples need to be having regular sex in a cycle, if they want to conceive and that they need to stop just trying in the so called old school thinking of the “Fertility Window” as identified as day 14, or between day 10 to day 17 of the cycle.
Like anything in life, if something isn’t working, then you need to change what you are doing. If that doesn’t help, then you need to get help from a professional.
I have helped over 12,500 babies into the world and this is part of what I teach my couples and part of my multimodality fertility program.
If you are having trouble having a baby, then call my staff and find out more about my fertility program and how we may be able to assist you in having your little miracle.
-No Stone Left Unturned
-Women & Men’s Health Crusader
-The International Fertility Experts